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So... How Did You Meet Anyway?

Saturday, February 4, 2012

Toldya So

“Honestly Tania, you have to meet him, he is perfect for you!”  I rolled my eyes at Nat.  We’d known each other for about 2 months, since she had moved down from Sydney.  About 3 weeks before she had started to bug me about meeting a friend of hers – Vas.  She was convinced we were very well suited and should get together.    No-one ever believes their friends, do they?  I mean – it’s not like they really KNOW us and can pick the right person without all our internal biases, is it?
“Nat, hun, honestly, I don’t think so.“
 I was busy, mum had died recently, and I was worried about my dad. Plus, this guy was in Sydney; no use to me 9 hours away.  It’s not like I could leave my family right now.  A long distance relationship was the last thing I wanted on my shoulders.
But Nat didn’t give up. She nagged, she suggested, she even got him to come to Melbourne!  Unfortunately she did it the same week I went to Malaysia for work.  Then one day whilst she was nagging me, I agreed he could call.  What had I done? She had worn me down! 
Vas rang the next night (I later found out he was ringing to stop Nat nagging him!).  We had a stilted conversation, always awkward when you don’t know the person on the other end of the line, and you really have no idea why you are talking – “Yes, it’s lovely weather. No, I didn’t see that goal.”
  He was coming back to Melbourne in a few weeks, unfortunately right around the time I was going back to Malaysia for 2 more weeks work.  Fates were aligning here – we weren’t meant to be together as Nat thought.
A couple of months passed, Vas and I had struck up an email and online chat friendship,but that was it really.  He was nurturing, funny, and very supportive of me. It was just chat, nothing more though. Around the same time I began to feel a meltdown happening, my belated reaction to mum’s passing, and needed some time away from the family to breathe.  I decided to take a trip up north to stay with an aunty who was like a second mum to me – it was a 2 full days drive, but worth it.
Every night for the 2 weeks I was away I spoke to Vas on the phone.  We grew so close.  The drive home from my vacation spot passed on the outskirts of Sydney where Vas lived.  I made a fateful decision, smiling at the thought of the smug look I was going to have to endure from Nat. 
As I left I rang Vas and asked what he was doing that night and suggested we could get together for dinner as I had decided to stop outside his hometown.  
It was a strange and nervous hello, followed by a dinner filled with laughter and relaxation.  He came to see me off the next morning with a bouquet of flowers, the first I had ever received from a guy.  I didn’t want to go, and I think if I had asked him, he would have jumped into the car with me in a heartbeat.  We both realised this was something great.
Long distance was not fun – a lot of miles were chewed up by our cars, and a lot of midnight phone calls were made, but Nat had been right, we were a great match!
After months of commuting between cities, I finally got a job and moved to Sydney.  A wedding and child has happened in the ten years we’ve been together, along with lots of fun, arguments and laughter. 
The greatest advice I can give for meeting someone – listen to your friends – they know what you need better than you do!  Thanks Nat!