So...How Did You Meet Anyway?: Pinky and Jean

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From Russia with Love

It's party time in Colorado Springs... Julie, my friend and co-worker, just got engaged. I've never been to an engagement party before, coming from Russia, where diamond rings aren't given out before weddings

A Big Win for Texas

We met at our orientation BBQ for grad school. I suppose many would call it fate... we never saw each other the entire event.

Earlier in the day during orientation I had met some fellow religion students, so I had strictly mingled with my new friends, while James (who didn't have orientation until 2 weeks later) made himself some friends.

Several people in both our groups wanted to meet the president of the university, so while our friends attempted to weasel their way closer to the president, we ended up face to face introducing ourselves- having a side chat. Within 5-10 minutes James had left his new group of friends to spend the remainder of the night with us.

I called him the next day and well you know how that turned out.

Finding That Perfect Ride

I was at my first real college party. I was out of my dorm room with friends I had only just met that week, at a party being thrown by upper-class-men junior boys.

I repeat: upper-class-men boys. Yeah, I know, it was pretty awesome. I didn’t have parents waiting for me to get home, I hadn’t had to create an elaborate rouse to allay suspicions of my whereabouts, and I wasn’t trying to pretend the drink in my hand was just a diet coke.

I felt like a real college student. An adult, if you will.

There was only one thing that can put a damper on a perfect evening like this: your ride telling you she’s ready to got home. I had an immediate pang of disappointment since I was definitely not ready to leave yet.

The booze was just starting to hit me and I had lots of people surrounding me and wanting to talk. I belonged, and I wanted to stay. “Okay,” she said, “We’ll just find you another ride home.”

Close Your Eyes and Defy Gravity

The story of how we met began in November of 2007. My best friend suggested that I go to her company Christmas party with a coworker she wanted me to meet. I have never been the type of person eager to be set up, so I was happy to tell her that I had plans for that same day.

Time passed, and my family and I paid a visit to this same best friend on New Year's Eve. She made mention of this coworker again. Once again, I blew off the idea of getting set up.

Flash forward to April of 2008.

No Fancy Car

In March of 2002, Merkus’s sister Karah from called to tell him about a work friend of hers named Stacie. She was a college-educated, independent professional, while

he was a long-haired college dropout, the lead singer of an obscure band

According to Karah, however, they had a lot in common…interest in Tom’s of Maine products, Crystal Deodorant and yoga. Hmm.

At the time, Merkus was living in Los Angeles and working in a series of bad jobs. His band was doing great, but no one gave a shit (and, in his words, they still don’t). Karah asked him if he’d be interested in meeting Stacie.

“Is she hot?” Merkus asked.

A Perfect Balance

Jonathan and I met a week after my 21st birthday.

It was at a dueling piano bar and my friends decided to dedicate a birthday song to me, which led to me trying to hula-hoop on top of the piano while they sang happy birthday.

I saw Jonathan with his friends sitting at the table next to the piano and thought he was cute.

My friends decided to let him know of my obvious crush and before you know it, he buys me a birthday drink. Although we exchanged numbers, after a few minutes of talking, I was not very smitten by his charm. He called a few days later and I decided I just wasn't interested.

I had just ended a bad relationship, and he was enjoying his single life.

From Fantasy to Reality

Our love story starts out in 2003 with a man and his dog in Dallas, Texas and woman snowed in, in Kansas City, Missouri. I’m originally from Texas so the Kansas City winters were killing me. I hardly even went out to the store let alone dated. Mostly stayed at home and played online computer games. I wasn’t interested in romance at the time.

Meanwhile my husband to be was in Dallas taking his mini schnauzer for a walk. The dog, Willum, slipped his leash and ran off. Hubby to be took off after him tearing though yards and alleys. He stepped in a hole and blew out his Achilles tendon. A neighbor found the dog and brought him home. Hubby went to the hospital the next day for surgery to repair his ankle. He ended up in a wheelchair with a cast on his leg.

It is a miracle that we met at all. Considering the fact that never one of us was looking for a mate and neither of us left the house much. The cosmos decided to bring us together despite our every effort to remain single.

Photo Okayed

One day a proposal came to my father from the prospective suitable boy's maternal uncle. Our family was known to them. After the initial proposal, the uncle and the prospective boy's father came to discuss the proposal with my father one evening. Maa made necessary preparations to receive the important guests.

During the meeting the suitability of the boy was discussed which included his education, which was pretty impressive, his profession and family. The uncle then asked baba about me. Both seemed to be satisfied and agreed to progress. Photographs were exchanged. The boy's photo was shown to me and my opinion was sought. I saw the face of a reasonably personable young man and decided he would do. I guess the young man also thought the same, for it was rumored his telegram to his parents read 'Photo Okayed'.

Ours was a very traditional arranged marriage with each other’s consent. Arranged marriages usually conjure a picture of a practical, well planned affair, devoid of any romantic aspect. In my experience, ours was far from it. One constantly thinks of the distant person. The element of surprise and anticipation of falling in love is incredibly romantic.

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Pinky and Jean

It was Halloween 1957 when we had neighbors moving in across the street. Being a close knit neighborhood, they were welcomed by everyone. There were seven kids; five girls and two boys. My two brothers and sister and I became friends with them all right off! I was in the 6th grade and Jean was in the 4th. We walked to school together and became best friends. On April 3rd 1958 I gave her an ID bracelet with "pinky" engraved on it, so that meant we were going steady. Through our junior high years we got very close, I even became an usher at church so I could be near her; she was in the choir. Nothing really changed in high school until my senior year when we kind of separated for a bit. The biggest fallout came when I had a girl flown in from Laconia NH for my Senior Prom. After a couple semesters at UMass Amherst, I got drafted in August of 1965 and went to Korea for 18 months. She was seeing someone pretty steadily when I came home three years later, but after being back for maybe a month at the most we got back together. She was the best thing that ever happened to me. We were married on January 25th 1969. It was a great 35 years till she died of cancer in November 2005.The ID bracelet is still with her. I will never get over losing Jean, but I was lucky to find love again. In 2009 I married Jean's older sister.
She has made these last years a special time in my life.